Too Young To Be Rushing Things

With it being the weekend of “love” it’s hard not to stop and reflect on your own love life. For me this festive season of love is overhyped and overrated, although I’m probably only saying this because I’ve never received a dozen red roses and  I only seem to get a “Happy Valentine’s Day” text from my parents. Ha! This time of year may have you feeling some type of way if you spent it alone; a friend of mine called me earlier this week in a strop about how “she’s so tired of being alone” and how she’s “been alone all her life”. There was a clear disconnect between me and her within this conversation because although I’m single just like her, I couldn’t sympathise or connect with what she was saying. My only thoughts during her Kanye West style rant were “what’s the rush to be with someone?”

With so many of my peers getting married and having babies, plus the added hype of being in a relationship it’s no a surprise my friend was upset about being alone. Watching everyone you’ve grown up with enter the next phase of their lives may have you questioning your own life. Am I doing something wrong? When will it be my time? When I was younger I always thought I’d be married with one kid by the time I was 25. I’m going to be 25 next year and the fairytale I had for my life seems so far away. I’ve realised there is so much more I want, than the fairytale idea of what I thought my life would be like at 25. Being someone’s wife or mother in 18 months is a scary thought in my mind.  

By no means am I knocking anyone who may have already entered this next phase of their life or has started to build their life with someone they love, but for me there is no rush for all of that. The truth is I’m in no rush to even catch feelings. Am I the only person that thinks everyone needs to take a breather and slow down? Marriage, kids and relationships all take a lot of commitment and time and I’m no rush to begin those journeys especially if it’s not right. 

Marrying someone just to move back into my mother’s house or having a baby with someone I barely even know is not the hopes I have for my life. Don’t get me wrong I do want to enter that next phase one day but there is no need to rush it all, just because it fits society’s timescale of when I ‘should’ be settling down. I’m 23 there and I’ve got my whole life ahead of me, there are so many things I want to accomplish, sharing someone last name is not the ultimate goal for me. I want to experience life to the fullest before I become one with another person.  

Not all of you reading this may agree with what I’ve said and who knows this time next year my thoughts may be totally different. All I can do is speak on this moment and right now, I will continue to scream “I’m too young to be rushing things”. I'm young, free and have so much ahead of me. So until I’ve lived life for myself let’s slow it all the way down. 

AK

x